B2 Session Ten Embracing the Shadow

Our dimension, the Earthly Plane is intentionally fabricated on the premise of duality, the existence of opposities, or polarities.. It allows one to explore and experience the wide swath between the extremes to freely choose the experience points in alignment with the personal intentions and pre-birth decisions. For a variety of reasons this has been manipulated to leave us with this overarching paradigm of good and evil. We learn to judge and thus experience moments and beings based on where there are on the continuum between the polarities. This, coupled with the constant wash of fear that floods the civilized world and beyond leaves most of us in doubt, hesitation, and varying degrees of terror. We, turn our collective and personal back on our beauty and innocence and circle the wagons, easily judging ourselves as good or bad…geeeeezzzz!

We become afraid of life, of living fully, and build the walls and behaviors and beliefs to keep safe, both inside and out. Often based on external influence and cultural beliefs we look for the parts of ourselves that are somehow dirty and build a case to disown them. Our focus shifts to what is wrong with us. We forget the truth and beauty of who we are by design and instead, compromise our fire to fit in and, like lemmings, shuffle towards a controlled life and inevitable oblivion.

A major case is built against our shadow side and we dutifully turn our back on many parts of us that we deem unworthy. We all know the result of these seemingly normal choices.

The challenge here is that the shadow and the whole process is misinterpreted…for the shadow is actually one the primary pathways to rediscover our whole self and reach the inner Light. Yet, the momentum is to find fault and criticize the elements of ourselves that make mistakes, fail, hurt, push, attack, protect, etc. We are taught to run from our shadows and thus stay far away from the Light…to survive, to fit in, to feel like we belong. Something is awry here…

Our shadow is born in the moments of living that hurt us. It is innocence that has been tarnished and chained by external judgment, criticism, trainings, and more. The shadow grows in the deep recesses of our inner world, in the subconscious primarily. We parrot the abuses, the injunctions, the lickings, the chastisings, and then keep them in their place…and somehow seem to feel good about it. We find fault with ourselves and become overly critical of our choices and actions and results. And, all the while, we feel like we are belonging better. And this does not even begin to acknowledge the subtleties of the collective cultural shadows that we are fed and buy into for the sake of survival. Wounded children everywhere…running the show.

Traditional methods of therapy designed to extricate and kill the shadow parts, or get rid of them, or deny them, are useless, but very damaging, further pushing us into a box of judgment that is defining and confusing at the same time.

“Into the valley of death rode the six hundred”. From the Charge of the Light Brigade by Rudyard Kipling. The way to move through the perceived and adopted shadow elements is to enter the darkness. Through the journey of facing the fears and embracing the shadows do we find and rediscover the true gifts hidden beneath their apparition. We don’t down parts of ourselves to splinter and become a scattered version of our wholeness. We do not assassinate these villainous elements…for we shall surely carry the guilt of doing so… no, we walk into the darkness with open arms and open heart and make the call for all of us to come home.

Shamanic traditions have a process of soul retrieval where one goes into the inner forest to gather the splintered pieces our our being. It is powerful, fraught with self imposed beliefs about danger to confront, chock full of energetic forms that push mightily to keep their exile, and a beautiful journey where we get to bring the children home.

The invitation of the times is to step into the abyss and reclaim these disowned parts of ourself to bring them back to integrate into our personal oneness soup. It is a precious act of self love, a conscious decision to be all that you are, warts and all.The old way of finding fault with our behaviors and choices gives way to seeking the beauty in our choices and making decisions and choices to create a new way of doing things in the future, a way that calls upon all of us to be invested in the best of us.

The shadows must first be identified. One does not have to go far to find the “dark ones”. The first place to look is at where you find fault with yourself, behaviors and actions that you have felt bad about, have judged and criticized, or been told about by others. The shadow is in the things we do not like about ourselves.The shadow is in the places where we are afraid to enter. It is in the thoughts, feelings, and history that we refuse or hesitate to look at. It is in the places where we stumble and fumble, where we yearn for a different life, or push away to isolate…in other words, it is there for us to see all the time.

We find the tendencies and then we name them, create our own gallery of rogues. But here is the thing. Each of these identifiable elements of us has a skill, a gift, a way to do things that is actually quite resourceful, useful, and practical given the right circumstance. The self critic is really good at finding nuances. The fearful one is really good at spotting unsafe situations or people. The angry one is actually a powerful one with lots of energy when channeled in a useful way. You see that by identifying the players, you begin to discern their gifts. Then you start to appreciate them for their “talents”. In doing so you start to befriend these elements and bring them home. Then you use your adult self to direct them to either sit down and wait or be summoned at the moment their skills are required. In this way you divert fault finding and blame to become acceptance, love, appreciation, usefulness, and celebration. That is an integration that will completely change how you show up to life…as well as how life shows up for you.

Block TwoSession Ten